{"id":589,"date":"2014-01-24T10:20:22","date_gmt":"2014-01-24T14:20:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/?p=589"},"modified":"2014-01-24T10:20:22","modified_gmt":"2014-01-24T14:20:22","slug":"straight-from-the-horses-mouth-incitatus-speaks","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/2014\/01\/24\/straight-from-the-horses-mouth-incitatus-speaks\/","title":{"rendered":"Straight from the Horse’s Mouth: Incitatus Speaks"},"content":{"rendered":"

Editor’s Note: Evan Stark ’15 presented the following speech at Mount Holyoke College on Friday, January 17 during Classics Day, a high school Latin event. His speech and outfit won second place in the Costume Contest.<\/em><\/p>\n

\"photo<\/a>Salvete! My name is Incitatus. I apologize if it is difficult to hear me, my voice is a bit horse<\/strong>. I\u2019m afraid many of you may not have herd<\/strong> of me, so allow me to tell you a little about myself. I began my career as a race-horse. I was the reining<\/strong> champion. I was so good, I even caught the attention of the Emperor Caligula. No Roman emperor has ever ruled with such unbridled<\/strong> madness. What a nightmare<\/b>! However I was fortunate enough to live a much more stable<\/strong> life.<\/p>\n

Caligula was so pleased with my performances he made me a senator. He even gave me gifts. I was living it up in an ivory manger, with purple blankets, and a collar of precious stones. I even had a house with slaves and furniture and everything. The best part was, I got to horse<\/strong> around whenever I wanted.<\/p>\n

Now, some people will tell you that Caligula made me a senator manely<\/strong> to poke fun at the other senators, but hay<\/strong>. Don\u2019t listen to those neigh<\/strong>-sayers. After all, who wouldn\u2019t want a stallion like me in the Senate? My looks alone tend to stirrup<\/strong> emotions, and all the mares come unglued<\/strong> at the sight of me.<\/p>\n

\"photo<\/a>Anyways, the emperor was just getting to be too much, and so one day I approached Caligula himself. \u201cListen, man,\u201d I said. \u201cYou\u2019re pasture<\/strong> prime. It\u2019s time to bale<\/strong> out. In fact, if you don\u2019t hoof <\/strong>it out of here soon, you could even be assassinated.\u201d But let me tell you something. That Caligula is stubborn as a mule<\/strong>. He stuck to his guns, and sure enough, he didn\u2019t last much longer. Now I\u2019m just a humble horse once again. If he were still alive right now, I could be a consul, and I wouldn\u2019t even have to jockey<\/strong> for the position.<\/p>\n

But you know what they say, you whinny<\/strong> some and you lose some.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Editor’s Note: Evan Stark ’15 presented the following speech at Mount Holyoke College on Friday, January 17 during Classics Day, a high school Latin event. His speech and outfit won second place in the Costume Contest. Salvete! My name is Incitatus. I apologize if it is difficult to hear me, my voice is a bit … Continue reading Straight from the Horse’s Mouth: Incitatus Speaks<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"_s2mail":"yes","footnotes":""},"categories":[58,16],"tags":[195,197,196],"class_list":["post-589","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-student-essay","category-student-speaker","tag-classics-day-2014","tag-evan-stark-15","tag-incitatus"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/589"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=589"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/589\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":592,"href":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/589\/revisions\/592"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=589"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=589"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/willistonblogs.com\/speeches\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=589"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}